Empfehlungen basierend auf "The Dance of Deception"

Ever wonder why your self-control, rationality, and compassion seem to go out the window when dealing with your partner? Couples therapist and relationship expert Steven Stosny explains it all in this revelatory book about the divide between our adult and our toddler brains. Too often, conflict in our intimate relationships reactivates our least-regulated "toddler" side, bringing out an instinctive desire to assert our own way and make everything a zero-sum game. Dr. Stosny shows the way toward overcoming these destructive impulses and nurturing our more loving and clear-eyed inclinations. Drawing upon his decades of experience in working with troubled marriages, he distills his insights into an actionable guide for embracing our best impulses in our relationships.Empowered Love is a valuable guide for married and live-in couples who struggle with an unhealthy dynamic; those already in individual or couples therapy who want a highly effective aid to help them communicate with their partner; and licensed therapists and counselors looking for an in-depth perspective on the developmental stages in play with relationship strife."Readers will garner valuable negotiating strategies, learn interactive exercises (including a 'bedroom scoreboard') to engage more proactively with their partners, and apply practical knowledge on shepherding their own relationships away from destructive behaviors and toward a unifying, durable connection. Readers on the lookout for self-development and a deeper loving connection with their partner will find ideas and guidance galore in this sensible relationship manual." — Kirkus Reviews"This book is for anyone who wants to learn from their painful relational past; rescue and revive a current relationship; and receive promise and hope for their future. This refreshingly brilliant book not only identifies the bottom line issues in relationships, it provides a concrete formula for creating mature, passionate relationships. In this book Dr. Stosny brilliantly identifies the underlying cause of all relationship dissatisfaction and distress. Refreshingly practical, the book draws a clear line between unhealthy and healthy interactions, enabling the reader to identify and prevent relationships disasters long before they happen. Steven Stosny's work never fails to inform, inspire and draw a clear roadmap to happier, healthier relationships." — Pat Love, Ed.D., LMFT, co-author You’re Tearing Us Apart: Twenty Ways We Wreck Our Relationships and Strategies to Repair Them"If you've ever wondered why all of your relationships are a breeze except for your intimate one, wonder no more. Steven Stosny explains how intimate partners often get stuck in repetitive and unproductive ways of interacting, and how, more importantly, to break free of these hurtful relationship habits. If your relationship isn't what it once was or what you hoped it would be, before you convince yourself that you picked the wrong partner, read this book! It combines cutting edge information about how our brains drive our choices in day to day interactions along with Stosny's extensive experience in helping people love each other more. This book is a must read!" — Michele Weiner-Davis, author of　The Divorce Remedy"Combining the latest in neuroscience with decades of experience as a couples therapist specializing in the most difficult cases, Steven Stosny has written a clear, practical, immensely readable guide to arm and activate our better angels. Empowered Love is for anyone who wishes to show up more humanely in our closest and most important relationships." — Terry Real, author of The New Rules of Marriage

Two former Harvard faculty—one an internationally-recognized negotiator and conflict management expert from Harvard Law, the other a leading behavioral neurologist and cutting-edge scientist from Harvard Med—join forces to introduce conflict resilience: the radical act of sitting in and growing from conflict to break the bad habits that sabotage our politics, workplaces, and most important relationships. Conflict is getting the better of us. From our homes and community centers to C-Suites and Congress, disagreements are happening everywhere, with increasing frequency, and are being treated like zero-sum games that allow little margin for error and even less room for productive conversations. This puts a tremendous and untenable strain on our most important relationships and institutions. Unable or unwilling to negotiate conflict with skill, we ignore it or avoid it for as long as possible; when we are forced to face it, we escalate everyday disagreements and temporary flare-ups as if they’re life-and-death. Neither approach addresses underlying issues, promotes stronger relationships, or yields satisfying results. But there is a solution: a combined skillset and mindset that Bob Bordone calls “conflict resilience”—the ability to sit genuinely with and grow from disagreement. In this powerful, hopeful book, he and renowned neurologist Joel Salinas, MD, combine the inner mechanics of conflict—literally what’s going on in our bodies and our brains during moments of distress—with a groundbreaking three-step framework for how to navigate it: NAME (& dig deep) EXPLORE (& be brave) COMMIT (& own the conflict) In a time of increasing polarization, where consensus, agreement, and problem-solving can sometimes feel elusive, Conflict Resilience provides practical solutions to a common dilemma: How do you handle disagreements and differences with integrity while finding a way to create strong, deep, and lasting relationships? Conflict Resilience is not another book about conflict resolution, nor is it about problem solving. Conflict Resilience combines practical applications of advanced conflict management and study of the human brain to teach anyone how to turn conflict and negotiation into an act of union. This book provides the most cutting-edge and scientifically-grounded tools for driving agreement when possible and for empowering you to disagree better when the differences cut deep and the relationships matter most. This is a chance to bring people together, and an invitation to radically transform how we interact with our friends and families, our co-workers, our students, and our neighbors—anyone with whom we find ourselves in disagreement.

The #1 New York Times best-selling guide to reducing hostility and generating goodwill between siblings. Already best-selling authors with How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk, Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish turned their minds to the battle of the siblings. Parents themselves, they were determined to figure out how to help their children get along. The result was Siblings Without Rivalry. This wise, groundbreaking book gives parents the practical tools they need to cope with conflict, encourage cooperation, reduce competition, and make it possible for children to experience the joys of their special relationship. With humor and understanding―much gained from raising their own children―Faber and Mazlish explain how and when to intervene in fights, provide suggestions on how to help children channel their hostility into creative outlets, and demonstrate how to treat children unequally and still be fair. Updated to incorporate fresh thoughts after years of conducting workshops for parents and professionals, this edition also includes a new afterword.

The trans experience is all-too-often the subject of fierce debate in the media and online. Whilst we're having more and more conversations about the trans experience, the stark reality is that hate crimes against the trans community have quadrupled over the past five years, and that two in five trans young people have attempted suicide. But behind the shock headlines and the distressing statistics, what does it really mean to be trans? In this powerful, extensively researched and deeply personal book, Kenny Ethan Jones, trans activist and writer, offers an authentic and in-depth insight into the trans experience. From gender dysphoria to surgery, from being outed to finding love and considering parenthood, Kenny Ethan Jones draws on his own life and the stories of others from the trans and non-binary communities to create discussion around the complexities and reality of the trans experiences in today's society. Dear Cis(Gender) People is a powerful call-to-arms, equipping people of every gender with the tools to step forward as allies in order to bring about meaningful change. Through taking action and speaking out, we can create a safer, fairer world for trans people; a world in which all of us can exist as our most authentic selves and celebrate who we are without fear.

The world-famous psychiatrist and author of the classic works Attachment, Separation, and Loss offers important guidelines for child rearing based on the crucial role of early intimate relationships.

Although communications emerging in therapy are ascribed to the mind's unconscious, dark side, they are habitually translated in clinical dialogue into the supposedly therapeutic language of reason and consciousness. But, Dr. Watzlawick argues, it is precisely this bizarre language of the unconscious which holds the key to those realms where alone therapeutic change can take place. Dr. Watzlawick suggests that rather than following the usual procedure of interpreting the patient's communications and thereby translating them into the language of a given psychotherapeutic theory, the therapist must learn the patient's language and make his or her interventions in terms that are congenial to the patient's manner of conceptualizing reality. Only in that way, he shows, can the therapist effectively bring about genuine changes and problem resolutions. Drawing on the work of Milton H. Erickson, he supports his findings with many (and often amusing) examples. This book, then, is a virtual introductory course to the grammar and language of the unconscious.

Two therapists analyze their own relationship to help untangle the common and frustrating barriers many individuals face on the road to a happy, loving, rewarding partnership. Many of the clients who end up in our respective therapist offices thought they were doing relationships right—avoiding the white picket fence, focusing on careers and experiences over babies and legally-binding documents, choosing someone after they “found themselves” first. However, like clockwork, around their early to mid-thirties, these clients show up at our door. Why? For the first time, they realize that they dislike their relationship and are frustrated by their partner but know that another break-up won’t fix things. They recognize a pattern of relationship misery that has them finally looking in the mirror asking, how do you make a relationship last? It took us many relationships, our own inner self journey (which we’re still on), therapy, therapy school, and helping thousands of people with their relationships, to learn to have better ones ourselves. Vanessa woke up at 31, after ending an engagement and moving to Los Angeles. John thought he woke up at 35 after his divorce. But he didn’t truly wake up until he was pushing 40.  In It’s Not Me, It’s You, John and Vanessa dissect their own relationship to help readers figure out theirs: what their relationships were like in the past, what traumas they carried into the new relationship, and how they work on growing together to foster a healthy and long-term bond. The surprising truth is falling in love is more about you than your partner. It’s more about challenge and growth than comfort and ease, and roots don’t grow from wishful thinking—they grow in the soil of communication, curiosity, patience, and understanding. It’s Not Me, It’s You is for anyone looking for real advice on relationships that takes both sides into account and discusses relationships with the honesty and clarity we all need.

Some investigators have argued that emotions, especially animal emotions, are illusory concepts outside the realm of scientific inquiry. However, with advances in neurobiology and neuroscience, researchers are demonstrating that this position is wrong as they move closer to a lasting understanding of the biology and psychology of emotion. In Affective Neuroscience, Jaak Panksepp provides the most up-to-date information about the brain-operating systems that organize the fundamental emotional tendencies of all mammals. Presenting complex material in a readable manner, the book offers a comprehensive summary of the fundamental neural sources of human and animal feelings, as well as a conceptual framework for studying emotional systems of the brain. Panksepp approaches emotions from the perspective of basic emotion theory but does not fail to address the complex issues raised by constructionist approaches. These issues include relations to human consciousness and the psychiatric implications of this knowledge. The book includes chapters on sleep and arousal, pleasure and fear systems, the sources of rage and anger, and the neural control of sexuality, as well as the more subtle emotions related to maternal care, social loss, and playfulness. Representing a synthetic integration of vast amounts of neurobehavioural knowledge, including relevant neuroanatomy, neurophysiology, and neurochemistry, this book will be one of the most important contributions to understanding the biology of emotions since Darwin's The Expression of the Emotions in Man and Animals.

The experience of separation and the ensuing susceptibility to anxiety, anger, and fear constitute the flip side of the attachment phenomenon. In an authoritative new foreword to Bowlby's classic study, Stephen Mitchell (who gives resonant voice to the relational perspective in psychoanalysis) bridges the distance between attachment theory and the psychoanalytic tradition.

Insights for romance to help you grow in freedom, honesty, and self-control as you pursue healthy dating limits that can lead to a happy marriage. How do you set smart limits on your physical relationship? How much do you get involved financially? And how do you know if you've found your future spouse? Dating can be fun, but it's not always easy to navigate the questions and intricacies along the way. In Boundaries in Dating, Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend, counselors and authors of the New York Times bestseller Boundaries, share their practical advice for adding healthy boundaries to your dating life. Full of insightful, real-life examples, this book will give you the tools you need to: Recognize and choose quality over perfection in a dating partner. Prioritize friendship within your relationship. Preserve friendships by separating between platonic relationships and romantic interest. Move past denial to handle real relational problems in a realistic and hopeful way. Enjoy this season of life.   Boundaries in Dating unfolds a wise, biblical path to developing self-control, freedom, and intimacy. Let Drs. Cloud and Townsend help you get to know yourself, solve problems, and enjoy the journey of dating and finding your life partner.